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GREETING.......welcome to my page~~~ feel free to read any post HERE........

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TAG MY WALL~~~~

have fun and enjoy your day~~ XOXO

Thursday, November 10, 2016

A small portion of life

Been half a year pass by.. it is coming to the end of this fantastic 2016. Quite alot of things happened.. friends getting married and start having babies.. but im here still fighting..

Current location: Singapore
Current work: Account Payable
Current status: In a relationship
Current hobby: Playing game
Current ambition: To earn more Kachings
Current beverage: Coffee
Current food: anything except spicy~~~~

Being in love and being loved~~~♡♡
Im a happy girl..

Tats all for the update..
Feeling lame and standing at the corner.. lol

Thursday, March 31, 2016

31.03.2016

How long has it been.. since i abandon this little secret garden of mine...

Days and weeks and years has gone by..

I had alot and alot of changes in life as well..

A little update for myself again~~~

Im currently stationed in Singapore.. doing what i liked best.. account assistant... in coming 26 years old.. im still single and not to say, worried of being 老姑婆.... seeing frens getting tied up one by one, makes me felt old.. its not like i dun wana stable down... its just that.. the time is not here yet....

Lol.. wat an old woman nagging there.. haha..

Hmm.. suddenly gotten brain stuck.. zzz chao...

Monday, June 30, 2014

My heart is so painful 😢

It has been weeks,
You started to keep a distance from me. 
I really hope it was just me thinking too much but i realised it wasnt. 

No matter how i text you or wat i text you. Out of 100%, you only will reply probably 60% of it. 

You probably duno how hurt it is to me. 
Awaiting ur text for hours, waiting your responds, scaring i might nag you or something. 

You didnt know, 
Ever since the day you keep your distance and be cool to me, 
It hurts so deep inside me. 
I didnt know if i did anything wrong or what. 

Each day, there will only be good morning and have a good day sort of text... And then good night...
It wasnt like before anymore..

I know you are busy for your career.. And i did not want to disturb you in being sucess in ur career... 
I will owes be your support no matter what...

But.. 
You started to keep everything from me...
I can only thinking too much to myself and worried blindly...
Silly?? 

I have always been thinking...
Am i not doing good enough???

Maybe, for you, im jz a random passenger that happened to fall for you. 
Maybe....

That day, i told you that i love you...
You replied that you are not ready to be in a relationship....

That day when i met you, i kept on hinting you that you might lose me...
You told me that you reject 2proposed... And i told you i dun wana listen to what you said. 
It was because i dun wana be the third one....

We have been so close....
But seriously, who or what am i to you???

I really dun need much. 
You just have to let me know, 
If you haven ready and i have the chance... I can wait....
I have been waiting for 180days...
I dun mind to wait for another 180days....

If you have another options....
Please be cruel to me... Hurt me that deep, so i can move on...

I jz want a word from you...
Not much.... Just a word..
Is it that hard???

Honestly, 
I really am tired already... 
Im tired to secretly fall in love with you..
Im tired to think of what will happen to us. 
Im tired to find ways to make ur day and to cheer u up...
Im tired to think of surprises for you and found that you dun like it...
Im tired already.....

I owes blame myself for missing you that much...
I couldnt stop not to nag you..
I jz couldnt stop thinking of you....
But i know you wont feel the same...

For you, im just another admire that you happen to like..
For you, im just another person who willing to spend tym for you..
For you, im just another girl that will be ur listener...

Since im jz another person, 
Even if im not around anymore, 
I think it wont effect you too much...

I lost my confident...
I lost my hope in love...

I hope you can find it, and bring it back to me...
Hoping that one day, it is you who said it to me...
Hoping these wasnt a sweet dream for me...
I will never wana wake up...

Wednesday, June 11, 2014

Maybe im thinking too much??

Maybe i was the only one who care?
Maybe i was the only one who concern?
What makes me in continueing believing?
Its you. 
When there are times i was thinking to give up, i remembered the good time we had. 
When there are times i feel so down, i remembered the advises you gave. 
You taught me not to let anyone to be my everything,
But you didnt teach me how not to make you to be my everything!
It had been months. But for me it is still effortless. What should i do to make you at least notice me?? 
I might be nagging and making you frustrating. 
But if i didnt care you, why should i even want to text you?? 
There isnt much that i can do for you. 
And if there is, that will only be sitting quietly beside you, please at least let me be there for you?
No matter how hard the situation is, please share with me. 
I know i cant help you solve your problem, but i promise i wont let you face it alone. 
I really dun wana say this, but i felt like useless.. 
Even if im there. I will only be the one that owes interupting you, annoy you, disturbing you. 
How i wish i can do anything jz for you. 

Maybe i was really thinking too much. 
But from what i see, it seemed like i was being deserted. 
I understand that you have your life and you want me to have mine too. 
But did you know how much i wanted to tie my life to yours???

Maybe i did too much and annoyed you. Maybe you feel that im very annoying. 
Maybe.... Maybe.... Maybe.... Maybe....

There are so many maybe inside my mind. I do not have a solution. 
I do not wana burden you with my problem as well. 
I can only lay there staring at the ceiling and keep asking myself.  Is he still there???
I can only keep myself busy from thinking these non-exist questions. 
I can only smile and says, im fine. 

Whats unknown remind silents. 
I never will ask you. 

Maybe someday. When you tell me you do not need me anymore, i will jz leave you silently. 
Maybe someday when you realise i had been there, i might have already left. 
Maybe someday, who knows when that someday will come. 

I cherish every moment that we had. 
I precious every smile that you gave me. 
I treasure every words that you shared. 

No matter what is waiting ahead of us, i jz wana say... Please. When you feel tired, turn back and find me behind you, i will be waiting for you to come and pick me up, so we can continue the journey together. 

Saturday, March 08, 2014

bla bleh blah

Recently i found that i have lost my passionate to write..
i've lost my motivation to write....
More over, i do not know what to write..

For the past weeks, my emotion is not too stable...
i tend to get away from my house and find someone to talk to...
im lucky i do have ppl to talk to....

i blah alot to my ah kor.... he jz sits there and listen to me...

i blah not much to another him.... knowing he has his own stress,
i do not wana be his burden....
god knows how much i have wanted his caring, but not a single words mention to him...
the only thing i can do right now is to wait...
wait till the right time....

you might think im crazy right???
i can say im totally fall for him...
so im willing to wait...
maybe till the day he tells me: i've got GF...
then i wil start to let go....

anyhow, he is single and im single...
we are friends....
tat is wat important at this moment....
we share, we care, we hang out, we laugh, we did alot of things together....
tats the memory already...

no matter how it ends in the future,
i cherish how our friendship are right now...
even tho we did not meet up that often...
well, i try not to get addicted, but he is my drug now...
couldnt say i cant live without him, but i can say if there is no news from him,
i will start to get panic, didnt know what to do...
its not felt in love, but start liking him bit by bit....
having the feeling of wanted to smile big big whenever thinking of him....

i dun care if he sees this or not.....
jz wana say: HEY, YOU WORTH ME WAITING!!!!!!!

last but not least....
longest steak didnt see him was 9 days.....
soon it wil be reaching 10th day....
i missed that dude!!

chao~~~~

Thursday, February 27, 2014

Emo-ing

Another night of me thinking of you. Looking at the pictures we ever took together....
 And it keep on remind me that you're no longer available to keep me accompany.... 

How many times i view it...
And how many times i wanted to remove it from me... 

But i promised not to... Even if u do not need me anymore... 

Has been a few month... Now to think of it, i wasnt that sad back then... Hmmm... Wat is wrong with me actually??? 

U might or might not see this... But i stil wanted to say that i miss you.. Regardless how cruel you are to me.. 

After this, i wil not think of you anymore.. Not even a single bit. 
I wil learn to let go, jz like what you did to me. 
I wil have my own life...
This will be the very last time i weep. Just for you....

I duno if you wil come back and cherish our friendship..
But even if you do come back, 
I will tell you, sorry, thing wasnt like before anymore..
Im no longer attached to you anymore... 
Please do not expect that i will be as friendly to you as before...

It wil start from zero if i would say!!!!!
Jz like what you said... Tats your choice..

PS: this wasnt blaming on you... 
I JZ WANTED YOU TO KNOW HOW THE FEELING WOULD BE!!!!!

Saturday, January 11, 2014

Once in a blue moon

BLOG!!!!!!!!!!

so, what blog does???????
i remember blog as something similar to diary but it is more public......
people sharing their thoughts and ideas in their blogs.....
some shares their daily routines, some shares their happy and sad moments........

my blog here im posting RUBBISH of my brains that generates automatically what it wana say.....
CREEPY >< >< >< >< >< >< >< >< >< ><

BLOGGING is the times when i became very VOCABULARY-ED and wrote nonsense about my life.......


SO.................
Here im again, writing nonsense.....

Once awhile, it doesn't feel bad actually..
but if imma do this everyday, i think i might gona get crazy n FLOAT NERVES...... funny...

ERRRRRRR...............chotto matte.....
did i mentioned that i changed new job??
My new job is awesome......
钱多,事少,离家近。。。标准的花瓶工作...... hehehe


so.....................
today is 11 January....
im going to have my exam starting 13 January...
Which i haven actually master any of it...
shame on it.... darn......
i prefer assignments over exams......
I HATE EXAMS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i guess tat would be all for today...
til next time~~~~CHAO~~~~

Tuesday, November 05, 2013

recently

saying that i wil be updating but wat happened??
i have been slack off again~~~~

to a sense of notice, i did not write like before...
i did not think like before too..
guess thats what ppl says, mind growing up huh???

sadly, only my mind is growing, and not my body....
i have been force to stay at this shape ever since i was........ 14???
years past and im stil in my original shape...
huhu but tat wasnt a bad thing tho...
at least i look chibi.. (Tiny in japanese)

one thing worth mentioning will be that

im glad myself knows how to think properly ledi...
i know what myself wants and know how to make myself happy..
tho there will be some emo times but i do wat suits myself...
i know that im not born to cheer ppl...

what i did was what i wanted...
for ppl who dun know me that well,

might as well you jz stay away from me,
jz incase you kena my bomb then go complain again..
there are many haters in this world,
jz see how myself gona take it and face it..
i choose to ignore the haters,
like a fren of mine says,
"Just be yourself"...........

i wont simply change myself for anyone unless he/she is really deserve that changes...
so far in my life i've only encountered that one and only,
which makes me wanted to stay with,
but due to some circumstance,
we are stil not meant to be together..
if there is future, how that will be..

hang on a minute...
shouldnt i be thinking for myself....
sigh... minds owes slipped whenever im thinking of that someone, again and again...
has been six years and still counting..
if it wasnt for my family's sack, i wouldnt care that much anymore...

nvm, if there are faith, there are fate, there are believes, there will be future...
guess its time for me to stop my 自言自语 again~~~~

stories are too much to be told..

might jz keep till next time~~~chao~~~